I think everyone can feel a bit overwhelmed at Christmas. I know I feel the perceived expectations of my family that may or may not actually exist. But in my own head they certainly do. We should all try to go especially easy on ourselves during the holidays and just remember we are doing our best and enjoy the times with family if we are lucky enough to have them . Great article Nina!
Yeah, I do feel grateful that I have a family I can spend holidays with, but let’s not push it with the enjoyment part😆
There are bits I do enjoy, so I try to hold on to that. But as you said, we should go easy on ourselves and maybe that also means not feeling something is wrong with us if we don’t feel the festive mood.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this Jeffrey!
Yeah, I do feel grateful that I have a family I can spend holidays with, but let’s not push it with the enjoyment part😆
There are bits I do enjoy, so I try to hold on to that. But as you said, we should go easy on ourselves and maybe that also means not feeling something is wrong with us if we don’t feel the festive mood.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this Jeffrey!
So aptly put! You open any social media site and you see your feed drowning in Chrissy noise, from the songs, to the red dresses, to the Santa madness, taking away from the real meaning of Christmas. All for these but let's acknowledge the true essence of Christmas. I love your version of Chrissy; isn't it all about relishing your fav delicacies, whilst doing your most fav things, with loved ones by your side is a bonus. :)
Getting to rewrite your traditions to better suit you is one of the greatest gifts of adulthood. You now get to write the rules. And if for you, being quiet behind the pages of a book feels safe and cozy, than I think that's something to look forward to.
You are right! It does feel good to rewrite the traditions. I think our first instinct says it's wrong, just because stopping doing something we've done for so long by default feels weird. But once we break the traditions, rituals, and patterns that no longer serve us, we feel relieved.
I have always loved Christmas and love it to this day (although, apparently, it's completely different in Germany than in Croatia. Here, it's very quiet, seeing the family, eating together and caroling - fireworks are for New Year's ...). But for unknown reasons, my mother didn't like Christmas at all - just like you. I could never understand it; but people are so different!
Oh, that sounds really nice, especially the quiet part!
I wonder if your mom had a similar experience with Christmas as I did... But I'm glad you didn't inherit that, haha... It's nice when you can just relax and enjoy the holidays.
Yes, Nina, I think my mom really had a bad experience at Christmas when she was a child; so that stayed with her for life … Today, we had most of the family here, 14 people, and there were some heated discussions. But then, we sang Christmas carols, with someone playing the piano and someone the trumpet, a baby crawling everywhere, and it was just great!
Thank you for sharing!! Your article is very validating! Navigating family dysfunction and overwhelm and grief during the holidays is very difficult, especially when it seems like everyone else is having an amazing time. But many of us struggle and talking about it helps! Here for you (:
I am with you. It’s such an overstimulating time of the year and the competing expectations and demands are really difficult to manage. Not to mention if you are sensitive to energy and you can feel the underlying tension between family members and/or the collective grief. It’s a lot!
I think everyone can feel a bit overwhelmed at Christmas. I know I feel the perceived expectations of my family that may or may not actually exist. But in my own head they certainly do. We should all try to go especially easy on ourselves during the holidays and just remember we are doing our best and enjoy the times with family if we are lucky enough to have them . Great article Nina!
Well said.
Yeah, I do feel grateful that I have a family I can spend holidays with, but let’s not push it with the enjoyment part😆
There are bits I do enjoy, so I try to hold on to that. But as you said, we should go easy on ourselves and maybe that also means not feeling something is wrong with us if we don’t feel the festive mood.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this Jeffrey!
Well said.
Yeah, I do feel grateful that I have a family I can spend holidays with, but let’s not push it with the enjoyment part😆
There are bits I do enjoy, so I try to hold on to that. But as you said, we should go easy on ourselves and maybe that also means not feeling something is wrong with us if we don’t feel the festive mood.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this Jeffrey!
So aptly put! You open any social media site and you see your feed drowning in Chrissy noise, from the songs, to the red dresses, to the Santa madness, taking away from the real meaning of Christmas. All for these but let's acknowledge the true essence of Christmas. I love your version of Chrissy; isn't it all about relishing your fav delicacies, whilst doing your most fav things, with loved ones by your side is a bonus. :)
Oh yeah... I'd say social media noise is equally disturbing as the one from firecrackers. Ugh...
Thank you so much for this comment, Ardhana!
Getting to rewrite your traditions to better suit you is one of the greatest gifts of adulthood. You now get to write the rules. And if for you, being quiet behind the pages of a book feels safe and cozy, than I think that's something to look forward to.
You are right! It does feel good to rewrite the traditions. I think our first instinct says it's wrong, just because stopping doing something we've done for so long by default feels weird. But once we break the traditions, rituals, and patterns that no longer serve us, we feel relieved.
I have always loved Christmas and love it to this day (although, apparently, it's completely different in Germany than in Croatia. Here, it's very quiet, seeing the family, eating together and caroling - fireworks are for New Year's ...). But for unknown reasons, my mother didn't like Christmas at all - just like you. I could never understand it; but people are so different!
Oh, that sounds really nice, especially the quiet part!
I wonder if your mom had a similar experience with Christmas as I did... But I'm glad you didn't inherit that, haha... It's nice when you can just relax and enjoy the holidays.
Yes, Nina, I think my mom really had a bad experience at Christmas when she was a child; so that stayed with her for life … Today, we had most of the family here, 14 people, and there were some heated discussions. But then, we sang Christmas carols, with someone playing the piano and someone the trumpet, a baby crawling everywhere, and it was just great!
Yeah, I thought so, sorry to hear that about your mom.
Your celebration sounds really wonderful, like from the movies! Thank you for sharing! ❤️❤️
I live half-way across the country from my big family, so only the two of us this year as our son is doing his own thing.
You are at a safe distance 😀
Thank you for sharing!! Your article is very validating! Navigating family dysfunction and overwhelm and grief during the holidays is very difficult, especially when it seems like everyone else is having an amazing time. But many of us struggle and talking about it helps! Here for you (:
Thanks for this comment Alina, and for reading!🧡
Idk if everyone is really having a good time or they’re just pretending😆
I am with you. It’s such an overstimulating time of the year and the competing expectations and demands are really difficult to manage. Not to mention if you are sensitive to energy and you can feel the underlying tension between family members and/or the collective grief. It’s a lot!
Thank you Rebecca!
Yes, I’d say I’m very sensitive to energy, that’s a really good way to put it.
Hope you’ve managed to protect your energy today!❤️